What do you get when you mix an evil cupboard, a sentient tail, and a horny giant?
3 Tall Tales by Patrick Kill. A collection of three fables for the seriously deranged.
In 3 Tall Tales we get;
โThe Magic Cupboardโ, the story of a young boy and his cupboard which brings anything he puts inside to life. A childโs short attention span, and magic powers, turn out to be a recipe for disaster and things soon get out of hand.
With โTall Tailโ we get a cautionary tale about a tail. It is a bit like โThe Blobโ but itโs a tail and, rather than devouring you, itโฆ Well, I think I will leave that to your imagination.
Finally, โThe Giant Man’ poses the question โhow do you have sex with a giantโ? Iโm not sure anything can quite prepare you for the answerโฆ
If youโve come to 3 Tall Tales looking for the next big name in literary horror, you will likely leave disappointed. Perhaps disappointed isnโt the word. Scarred for life feels more appropriate.
All three stories are structured and written like a fairy tale, or an urban legend, and there is a mix of gross-out horror, with touches of bizarro and plenty of dark humour throughout. โThe Magic Cupboardโ was perhaps my favourite, taking the basic concept of the classic childrenโs story โThe Indian in the Cupboardโ, and taking a far more mean-spirited and outrageous approach. โTall Tailโ was a pure bizarro comedy and โThe Giant Manโ was undoubtedly one of the most messed up things I have ever read.
Clocking in at a very brief 23 pages, this is a brief read but an incredibly entertaining one, and one that defies description. The best way I can think to set your expectations is, imagine Edward Lee and Carlton Mellick III teamed up to write short stories for children, and you at least get a vague sense of the depraved madness packed into these pages. If youโre in the market for something quick, fun, and completely lacking in good taste, then this is the book for you.
3 Tall Tales is a hilarious, sick, twisted, joy. I hope that Patrick Kill can get the help he so clearly needs (but not before we get a few more books in this series of course).
3 TALL TALES by Patrick Kill
Amazon.com Price: $1.99 (as of 03/04/2021 19:21 PST- Details)
The first in the series of digital collections featuring 3 midget-sized stories that sell for $1.99.
Description
The first in the series of digital collections featuring 3 classic Patrick Kill short stories. Only available digitally in the 3 Tales Trilogy. Stories in this collection include:- “The Magic Cupboard”
- “Tall Tail”
- “The Giant Man”
Additional information
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More On This IndieMuse Contributorโฆ
Richard started reading horror books at a young age, starting with R L Stine's 'Goosebumps' and 'Point Horror' series. He traumatised himself at the age of twelve when he read Stephen King's 'IT', and never looked back. He is currently based in the UK, where he lives with his partner, and an inappropriate amount of books.